Work for Live? or Live for Work?

The Story

A long time ago, there was an Emperor who told his horseman that if he could ride on his horse and cover as much land area as he likes, then the Emperor would give him the area of land he has covered. Sure enough, the horseman quickly jumped onto his horse and rode as fast as possible to cover as much land area as he could. He kept on riding and riding, whipping the horse to go as fast as possible. When he was hungry, thirsty or tired, he did not stop because he wanted to cover as much area as possible. Came to a point when he had covered a substantial area and he was exhausted and was dying. Then he asked himself, "Why did I pushed myself so hard to cover so much land area? Now I am dying and I only need a very small area to bury myself."

The Lessons

The above story is similar with the journey of our LIFE. We push very hard everyday to make more money, to gain power and recognition. We neglect our HEALTH, TIME with our family and to APPRECIATE the surrounding beauty and the HOBBIES we love to do. One day when we LOOK BACK, we will REALIZE that we DON'T really need that much, but then we cannot turn back time for what we have MISSED. Life is not about making money, acquiring power or recognition. Life is definitely NOT about WORK! Work is only necessary to keep us living so as to enjoy the beauty and pleasure of life. Life is a balance of WORK and PLAY, FAMILY and PERSONAL time. You have to decide how to balance your life. Define your PRIORITIES, realize what you are able to compromise but always let some of your decision be based on your instincts. Happiness is the meaning and the purpose of life, the whole aim of human existence. So, take it easy, do what you want to do and appreciate nature. Life is fragile, Life is short. Do not take life for granted. Live a balance lifestyle and ENJOY Life!!

My Opinion

Yeah, basically "The Story" and "The Lessons" does make sense in the purrrfect world. But hey, the world we live in is not it. Plus, we're only mortals whom always do mistakes and errors. To me, living my life for myself currently is more than enough.

Home Sweet Home

Yippiee.. Coming home at last.. I'm homesick.. Really want leave Jakarta.. Counting on the minutes to fly back home.. I misses my parents, my lil bro, my friends and my sweet home...
Yay.. coming homeeee...

My First Bussiness Trip to Jakarta

Hey, its been awhile since my last posts. I'm on a bussiness trip and been quite buzy past these weeks. Currently, I' staying at Hotel Kristal at Jln Tarugong Raya, South Jakarta. And our clients office is quite far from our hotel, which takes us 30-40 mins to Bintaro. We're lucky that we don't have to go to the client head office which is in Sudirman that will takes us about 2 hrs to be there. The culture here is quite diffrent. Men and women can share a musollah. I'm very uncomfortable with this. They only used water filter "aqua water" to be drink. The food here is quite nice but can be said moderate in price. I did'nt try any of the food sell off side of the road. I might end up getting diarrhea if I do so...

The time is quite funny. At 6am, its already bright like 7:30am in Malaysia. And 6pm here, its dark like 8pm in Malaysia...I'm so not used to it until I can't get proper sleep the first two day I've been here. Unfortunately, I've fall sick with flu and high fever in the weekend... Jessie too... So, our shopping plan is cancelled. (Sorry Tapa, most probably I can't buy all the things in your wishlist)... I'll try to if we have the time here... Huhuhuhu...

Talking about work, its fine here.. eventhough clients are all the same... They're being pushy just to get what they needed.. Its the same on our side... For the pressure that was piling up because of works, when we reached our suite by 9pm, we were already half-dead. We were fortunate if we can even cook maggie mee for our dinner. But, sometimes I will join Raihan to the gym. Running on the machines to ge ride of the work pressure.












We get a suite with 2 rooms. The suite is very nice. Very similar to my dream apartment. Hmm.. got to go for now. Will update and put up more pictures whn I can..

Encounter with a Psychotic

Last Saturday, I went to watch movie wif my dear shopping mate. Unfortunately, we arrive to MidValley a wee late, around 12pm which force us to take 3pm showtime (for the latest Bond movie). So, to kill our time we hanged out at MPH for free reading :P While browsing around tons of books, a guy approach me nicely starting on a pleasant conversation. well, naturally I will be polite to him and enjoy our convesation as a normal human being. After chit-chatting on general topics for 5-10 minutes, i've to excused myself as the clock ticking off to 2pm (since I've agreed with my friend that we're going to have lunch past 2pm). Suddenly, the 'nice' guy turn out to be a 'psycho' and don't want me to take my leave. He had grabbed my arm, blocked my way and cornering me to the book rack.

I'm starting to panicking but manage to calm myself down because there's many people there. I've threatened him, that I would shouted for help if he try to do something to me. This psycho doesn't even intimidated with my threat. He said that if you do that, you will only embarrassed urself. Then, suddenly he asked me with whom I'm coming with? Where's that guy and so on.. He's starting to take in my nerve. Finally, I just broke free from him by stomping my heels on his foot (since he's standing very close to me at that time..).. Gosh, I was pretty terrified..

Luckily, I've met with my friend after a few moment as he's also looking for me.. I don't think he know how very relieve I am seeing him at that time.. Huhuhu, seriously... I've learn the lessons.. "Don't speak to strangers".. or "having a suspicious nature or be cautious at times are good for you"... or keeping up my bengis attitude towards strangers (especially guys).. I think the psycho wacko guy are in despressed (his gf just dumped him) or desperate (desperado are very dangerous) or he is a psycho... I would be extra careful next time...

Lessons of Life

I received these contents - email from a friend of mine. After reading these, it the hard cold truth just struck me stupefied that these are the naked truth that I can't bear... Truly.....

1. It hurts to love someone and not be loved in return, But what is more painful is to love someone and never find the courage to let that person know how you feel.
2. A sad thing in life is when you meet someone who means a lot to you, Only to find out in the end that it was never meant to be and you just have to let go.
3. The best kind of friend is the kind you can sit on a porch swing with, Never say a word, and then walk away feeling like it was the best conversation you've ever had.
4. It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives.
5. It takes only a minute to get a crush on someone, an hour to like someone, and a day to love someone-but it takes a lifetime to forget someone.
6. Don't go for looks; they can deceive. Don't go for wealth; even that fades away. Go for someone who makes you smile because it takes only a smile to a dark day seem bright.
7. Dream what you want to dream; go where you want to go; be what you want to be, because you have only one life and one chance to do all the things you want to do.
8. Always put yourself in the other's shoes. If you feel that it hurts you, It probably hurts the person too.
9. A careless word may kindle strife; a cruel word may wreck a life; a timely word may level stress; a loving word may heal and bless.
10. The happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything they just make the most of everything that comes along their way.
11. Love begins with a smile, grows with a kiss, ends with a tear. When you were born, you were crying and everyone around you was smiling. Live your life so that when you die, you're the one smiling and everyone around you is crying.

Ladies Nite

Yesterday i've met with my best friends, Nisya and Lily. Aiihhh.. we have'nt met about 6 months. We're too buzy living our lives. Within these limited 3 hrs, we've chit-chatting, keeping purself up-to-date with each other latest news, gossiping and having dinner too. (Imagine how active our mouth at that time.. :P) Our meeting point is Manhattan Fish Market, Mid Valley Megamall outlet.

Meeting them makes me thinking about the unknown future (Since they started it with "Dayah, ko camner? Kitorg dah planning nak kahwin 2-3 thn lg."). What would it like when we meet again in the future, say... 5 yrs time? Oh my god, i'm guessing both of my best friends would be married at that time and bringing along their kids or hubbie or beau with them. Hahaha... Time flies by really fast... It won't wait for anything....

Gosh, how i miss them so much. How I miss our relax time in U.M.? Misses the old good times won't do much for me currently.. Hmmmm.. On our girl-talk sessions, they keep pushing me to start anew relationship with someone new.. Hmm.. not that I don't want to try but, luka lama still berdarah.. Hahaha.. It takes a looonngggg time to heal.. Gosh, how I hate to be reminded of that.. Yeah, maybe I'v become a wallflower without me realising it...

Anyhow, that aside.. There's few things that worries me currently.. I have to go Jakarta to work. yeah, i'm fine with travelling but my concern is my parents.. It does'nt sit me well to leave them even for 3 days.. Yes, i realize that sooner or later I have to leave them.. But, when look at Kak Mie's now at London, me going to Jakarta (and buzy with works) an Ija studying at Russia.. Leaving An as the only one with Mama and Abah... Hmm.. does'nt sounds well at all...

Lately, Mama and Abah always asked me to come home early... Well, I can't always do that.. My works requires me to stay late most of the time... I've even considering to change job early next year that is if I can't stand with the job pressure and responsibilities.. Hmmm... I hope the uneasiness, despair (all -ve thoughts) that dwells in my heart will disappear soon....

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

Your Birthdate: October 16

You're incredibly introverted and introspective. You live inside your head. You spend a lot of alone time meditating and thinking. People see you as withdrawn, and at times they are right. You are caring and deep, but it may be difficult for you to show this side of yourself. Your strength: Your original approach to thinking Your weakness: You tend to shy away from others Your power color: Pale blue Your power symbol: Wavy line Your power month: July

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

Kronologi Aidilfitri

2hari sblm Raya
Mengemas rumah yg dah 6 bln tak dikemas. Huhuhu.. Bukannyer pemalas.. Tp, dah mmg projek membersihkan sawang dan habuk2 di bawah almari, tukar langsir, cuci karpet, lap tingkap, lap kipas and etc biasanya dilakukan menjelang Raya. Hari yg memenatkan. (Ija.. aku btul2 rindu kat ko hari nie.. Selalunyer, ko yg tlg aku.. nak harapkan tuan muda tue jgn harap ler... Last2 abah yg tlg aku.. huhuuhuhu)

1hari sblm raya
Hmmm... Ayat berkesan mama mintak aku bersihkan bunga2 plastik and batu dia tue "Dayah, mama tgk bunga2 mama tue dah tak berseri dah. Nak buang sayang pulak.. Baru jer beli tahun lepas... Malu la plak kalo org tgk berhabuk, tak berseri.." Walaupun penat smlm tak abis lagi, aku wat gak kerja remeh nie...
Pastue, abah pulak kata "Dayah, abah dah abis anyam ketupat.. Jgn lupa isi beras and pulut dlm kelongsong tue"... (Ija, for your info, thn nie abwah wat ketupat 2x ganda dr biasa... huhuhhu.. 3 jam aku isikan.. saat2 tue, aku terkenangkan ko ler.. huhuhuhu.. kalo ko ader cpat skit abis.. hehehe"
Kak mie punyer turn plak "Dayah, ko dah abis wat tue tlg aku racik bawang, serai, halia, etc utk rendang nie. Sapa suruh ko tak temankan aku gie pasar.. Dah kejutkan tak bangun2.... Cisss.." Huhhh.. kederat aku dah abis smlm mengemas rumah.. Tak larat nak bangun pkul 7 gie pasar.. hehehe.. sorry ler...
Malam lpas berbuka, mulakan aktiviti isi duit raya dlm bekasnyer... habis dkat RM650 tahun nie bg duit raya.. pegh.. rabak bulan nie.... nasib baik gaji masuk awal...

Hari Raya per1
Plan nak balik kg pkul 10am tergendala sbb Sultan Selangor sampai utk tunaikan solat sunat raya amat lewat.. 8:45am... kesudahannyer.. solat sunat raya tamat pkul 10am... alhamdulillah, jalan tak jammed.. sejam jer dah smpi tg karang, selangor. Hari nie 7 buah rumah dikunjung... Tiap2 rumah makan juadah hari raya.. (as usual terpaksa laa makan skit2.. takut kecik hati tuan rumah) Tahap kenyang hari tue, tahap maximum.. Ptg tue, try godek ariel tv yg bengong.. berusaha carik channel RTM 1 sbb muka Cik Hod ader kuar wat salam perantauan.. Hahaha... Tp, malangnyer, by the time dpt carik channel, ucapan dah abis dibuat.. Huhuhu.. Sian Cik Hod... Tak dpt tgk muka sendiri kat TV wat ucapan... Mlmnyer... lepak rumah Wak Wie, tunggu Ija call...

Bwh, gambar di pagi raya per1...



Hari raya ke2
Dpt beraya 8 buah rumah lg... Balik Shah Alam ptg tue gak.. pkul 5 dah smpi rumah.. Balik rumah tido ler... Tak larat weihhh...

Bergambar di pagi raya ke2...



Hari raya ke3
Gie Batu Laut and Banting.. Lg 7 buah rumah paman2 yg dikunjung..

Hari raya ke4
Yeah... hari dok rumah, rilex... Tp, pagi2 lg aku kena gie immigration.. amik passport.. pastue ge opis jap.. tgh hari balik rumah.. tlg2 apa yg patut... malam, gie rumah mak long....

Hari raya ke5
Hmm.. Pagi pergi Gombak, beraya kat rumah Cik Kecik... Then, t/hari gie Dengkil plak.. beraya kat rumah Kak Farah (kwn Kak Mie yg sesama nak gie London)... Ptg plak, Wak Mon dtg rumah beraya.. Jamu family wak ngan Sate Dengkil.. (sbb short notice, nasib baik gak dpt sate Hj Samuri)... Malamnye.. wat preparation utk open house.. lenguh giler...

Hari raya ke 6
Open House... Pg2 lg pkul 7, kemas rumah... Pkul 8, tlg Kak Mie memasak.. Pkul 10, gie amik sate ngan roti Jala, pkul 11 org mula berkunjung.. lebey kurang pkul 2, org yg datang ramai giler.. smpi ke dapur depa duduk... huhuhu.. mintak maap ler.. kalo tak terlayan.. tamat pkul 10pm.. huhuhuhu.. penat giler... tp, best... time kasih yg datang... yg tak datang.. rugiler korang.. :P

sekian kronologi..

Happy Burfday

Happy Burfday to me.. Uikss.. Umur dah makin tua - 23... Tp, pemikiran tak matang2.. Hehehe.. But, I don't give a twit as long as I'm happy..

The "L" words (bliss, sacrifice or despair)

Yeah, I know.. I rarely express my feelings or opinions on the "L" words openly. Nope, I'm not a homo.. (Tak nak tergolong dalam kaum Nabi Luth, Nauzubillahiminzalik). Just that I feel that its really personal to me and that's why, I rarely discuss (in details) on my relationships or affairs with anyone (even with my best friends.. exception to my younger sister, Ija because we're really close)...

What makes my sudden outburst of emotional flows was teasing by few of my colleagues and closed friends saying “Your attitude makes people (in this context, guys) afraid to get to know you laaa. Tak kahwin ko nanti”. Yes, I admit that peeps who don’t know me well enough, will have these kind of first impression of me – “Garangnyer budak nie”, “Ice-queen type of girl” and etc. But, the truth is I’m not. The real things is, I don’t know how to make/take the first step (especially in relationship). From my own observation, peeps that are now my buddies make the effort to get know me first. (Yeah, they’re really patient with my tantrums / songeh.. ehehehe.. Thanks guys). And as fair exchange, I returned them a sincere friendship.

About the “L” words, it needs two people to make it. (Tak guna bertepuk sblh tgn, menyeksakan dua belah pihak). The most important is, “L” word shouldn’t be base on these forbidden reasons: lust, greed, envy, revenge, solitude, fun, beauty or etc. My philosophy of the “L” words are, it’s like waiting a bus at the bus station. There is many type of bus that I can ride on. But, when I want to take the first bus, it might be full with passengers. The next one is an old bus, with no air conditioner. The third one might be dirty and dusty. The next bus the engine broken down. Yes, I’m aware that if I kept being choosy I might not get a ride at all.

In the scenario that I’ve already got a ride, but I have to get down somewhere off my destination due to some raison d'être; I will get down. I’ll be waiting there for a time, hoping the same bus will fetch me and send me off to my destination. For me, the “L” word doesn’t mean that we have to be with that person. Sometimes, letting go of that person is also a way to show the “L” words.

Hmm… I would be stupid if I kept waiting for ages for that bus to pick me up. If another reliable bus coming along after my confinement, I will not hesitate to take a ride. (It would be self-abusive if I not do so. Myself deserve a second chance.) But, if the first bus mange to catch-up with the current bus I’m riding and invited me back to him: I would say this to him “I’m sorry we were not meant to be together. I’ve given you ample time and it would be unfair for my current ride. So long, farewell, take care.” And to my current ride “ Thank you for taking me in.”.

However, I will explain to the second bus that he’s not in the top of my “L” list in my heart. The first is Allah, 2^nd is prophet, 3^rd is Al-Quran and angels, 4^th is my parents, 5^th is my siblings, 6^th is my family, 7^th is ‘your place’, 8^th is my friends. Can you compromise???

Blissful Weekends

It was such a blissful weekend… yippee… I was able to do my favorite things to do which is, SHOPPING… I’ve spend nearly to RM 650 ++ on these:

- 1 Elle Suit (it’s really cute ^_~)

- 2 pairs of Dorothy Perkins bootleg pants

- 1 Zara knitted tops

- 1 Padini knitted tops

- Pierre Cardin stuffs..

*** I know in Ramadhan we have to control our lust in every way, but this weekend I failed terribly. But, considering I have not shop for nearly 3 months, which is a feat for me, actually. Even my elder sister did not discourage me not to shop. She even helps me to choose my selections… I will try my best to change (a false promise, I presume.. muahaha.. A shopaholic can't change her true color)

Menjelang Ramadhan

Do'a Malaikat Jibril Menjelang Ramadhan ""Ya Allah tolong abaikan puasa umat Muhammad, apabila sebelum memasuki bulan Ramadhan dia tidak melakukan hal-hal yang berikut:
* Tidak memohon maaf terlebih dahulu kepada kedua orang tuanya (jika masih ada);
* Tidak berma'afan terlebih dahulu antara suami isteri;
* Tidak berma'afan terlebih dahulu dengan orang-orang sekitarnya.
Maka Rasulullah pun mengatakan Amiin sebanyak 3 kali. Dapat kita bayangkan, yang berdo'a adalah Malaikat dan yang meng-aminkan adalah Rasullullah dan para sahabat, dan dilakukan pada hari Jumaat.

Melalui pesanan ini saya memohon maaf jika selama ini saya memiliki kesalahan, baik yang tidak di sengaja mahupun yang di sengaja.

The famous "Malas" syndrome

Aihhh... My dear lil sis sebarkan syndrome malas dia to me, eventough she's 100000miles away (Sheesshh.. 'malas' is very contagious.....)
Symptom2 'malas' yang ketara on me currently:
malas nak pergi kerja
malas nak buat kerja
malas nak pikir masa depan (e.g: ......)
when I:
love to sleep
love to watch movie/tv/anime
love to be "Lazy"
love to go shopping
still:
have to go to work
have to complete all mys tasks well
currently:
have to 'start' thinking on the future (takes sometimes though @_@.. one whom is close to me knew that i take future as "The future comes soon enough. Let it be.")
but the world is not fair:
all that i Love to do's, is the things that I can't do for time being (I'm damn buzy)...
and, the reality:
I have to plan and decide on my own what's best for me
(Hazardous defects on me = Bad in time management + Bad in making decisions)...

Stressful months...

“Job stress comes in many different forms and affects your body in various ways. Major stress comes from having too much work, not having enough work, doing work that is unfulfilling, fearing a job layoff, or not getting along with your boss. Minor sources of stress may include equipment that won't work or phones that won't quit ringing.” Source from Yahoo: Managing Stress

I was diagnosed to have major stress problem. The symptoms was damn obvious and is tiring me out. I could'nt even get peaceful sleep at nights. Sometimes I will snap out and feels like I'm going to be crazy at some point. The frustration keep building up. Even dark circles started showing under my eyes and makes me look like a panda. One of my seniors once comment on my looks that " Siti, you look like hell". At that moment, I was shocked by her remarks but reply to her casually "You does'nt look any better". Yeah right, as if I have the time in the world to maintain my appearance.. (Sheesshhh... If I do that, half of my works will not be completed at any rate)

I have tried many ways to heal my tormented soul like pampering myself (either shopping, movies, hair spa or being substitute maid or driver for my mum), not going to work in the weekends, sleep, eat etc but nothing seems to work well. A few of my friends suggest to take a break, away from work and the stress. But, currently is a crucial time. I will not be able to apply for leaves. (Damn, even now I'm not sure if I able to take Hari Raya leave.)

Sometimes I've been wondering, what's keeping me moving at this time?. (Hmm.. I'm still mulling over this).. No, I'm not a wonder woman or genetically superior human being that I can complete all task perfectly (which is, currently an overload). I'm just doing what I can do. So, please don't put anymore pressure on me .... Gimme a break ..

Decisions and choices.

In our every day life, we have to make up our own decisions and take responsibilities of it. All decisions made was done after thinking about it thoroughly, contradicting the pro's n con's, options available for that matters, and the most important thing is the impact and rationale's behind the decision's.

When I was young, I’m having nothing to be worried about since everything was taken care off by my parents. When I was a teenager, I’m worried and about what clothes I’m going to wear, what presents should I get for my best friends, mulling over about my weights, what I’m going to be when I was an adult, (doctor, programmer, engineer, etc), try my best to get good grades or busying myself with puppy love and so on... But now, when I’m an adult, I'm working hard on building a career, maintaining good relationships (like my family, friends, colleagues, etc) and also the unforeseen future.

By the time passing by I’ve realize that each decisions I’m about to make will have a very big impact in my life. What make me so indecisive while making decisions was these kinds of thoughts that I’m having: Am I able to carry it out well? What will happen next? Will I hurt anyone by taking this option? And the scariest part is: What if I screwed up? The uneasiness and insecurity feelings will always lingers in my heart even though I look very confidant at times. (Am I allowed to feel this way?)

Yes, I know that is how our life goes on… By making decisions and choices. And I know that, as normal human being (I’m not genetically superior human being ;) as was claimed by few of my colleagues) we apt to make errors and mistakes because we learned our lessons from that. However, I was blessed to have understanding family, supportive friends and colleagues whom always be the ever listener, sharing their point of views and also giving me other wonderful options. I thanked God and them for that.

Omigosh!

It have been nearly to 2 years since I have'nt updated my blogs. I have been terribily buzy in these 2 years. (which the results is I've graduated in 2005, and started working in 2006). And, since working making me feel very stressed and depressed at some times, i feel that blogging is one of positive ways for me to release all the -ve energy bottled up in me. And, also taking my dear lil sis advise to activate back my blogging. (Thanks, Ija). So, i'll start posting soon enough. Matta-ne...